A Fable

Someone took their car to the garage recently and the mechanic started asking them a few questions. "Well, yeah, I drive it hard and fast six days a week, probably 15 hours most days, but I make sure I fill up with petrol when it’s near empty and I do park it in a garage most nights."

"Ok" says the mechanic. "Tell me more."

"Well it still has good acceleration, which I need, and still takes corners nicely. But somehow it just doesn’t feel quite right any more. I can’t put my finger on it.
Sometimes when I park up in the garage at night the lights won’t switch off and it makes a weird noise, so I put a bit of red wine in the tank which usually helps. Although more recently recently in the morning the engine hasn’t started till I slosh in some coffee which does make it splutter a bit, but once we get going, it’s all okay again. Doesn’t seem to do any harm."

The mechanic asks a few more questions. They wonder if maybe the engine has got so revved up going at 100 miles all day till it screeches into the garage with a handbrake turn, it just takes time to switch off.

"Yeah but I’ve always driven it that way and it’s been fine." Says the customer with a shrug.

"What about the oil?" The mechanic asks. "It’s a nice car, unique ... do you put in good quality oil regularly? It’s important for keeping it all running smoothly under the hood."
"Well, you know, oil is so expensive these days that I just shove in the cheap stuff - it’s got nice pictures of happy looking cars in the sunshine so it must be alright. I don’t think it makes much of a difference anyway."

The mechanic nods their head thoughtfully.

"Oh and since we’re here, the electrics have been a bit iffy lately, maybe there’s something wrong with the computer. These random lights keep flashing but I’ve covered them over with some black tape so I can’t see them anymore, so I guess it must be alright."

The mechanic raises an eyebrow.

"Oh, and this there’s this terrible alarm but I just pulled out the wire which seemed to fix that too. Don’t know what that was about. Not sure what it’s connected to. Hey ho."

They pause for a while.

"But, you know," the customer says with a more optimistic tone, "the car’s not that old, and whilst it has got 500,000 miles on the clock, there aren’t any scratches or dents to the bodywork so that’s the main thing, right? A few more years left on the clock, wouldn’t you say?"

So the mechanic did his checks, the car passed its MOT (“everything is normal”) and the customer went on their way, wheels screeching as they exited the garage forecourt in a plume of dust and fumes.

The customer never did take their car to a certified Health Coach. Pity really. They only ever had the one.